OSH: Stanley’s Brownie Shoppe


One of the swell fellas in my current game plays a rather interesting character, a magic-user who has spent a little too much time in his workshop with strange and potent brews, chemicals, and mixtures. Today he is a bit ‘out there’ and when first encountering a strange and possibly dangerous enemy he often is seen to be offering on of his trademarked  brownies.

Yes, THAT kind of brownie.

So I thought about it a little while and I can see Stanley one day retiring to a small village nestled on a country crossroad, setting up a quaint shoppe and offering his mind alerting yummy brownies to the masses that pass through the village. All in all, not a bad way to retire man.

It occurred to me the other day that to run the shoppe, he would certainly need more than one type of brownie on the menu. So, while this may be me asking for more trouble that it is worth, I thought it might be fun to come up with a few variations on the yummy brownie theme for my Old School Hack game. Please note (I’m looking at YOU Keith) that a person can only be affected by one brownie at a time, ingesting a second one negates the effects of the first brownie eaten.

I may regret this, nay, I know I will regret this, but here goes. 😉


Nestled on the edge of a small village on a crossroads lies a small two story building. From outside, one would never suspect the wonders that lie within. Come to think of it, after speaking with the proprietor, one would never imagine him capable of the wonders within either. But if one was to stop, take the moment to look at little closer, one would find all manner of miracles to be had with just a little help from the mad baker named simply as Stanley.

The confections available within this establishment include:

Wiltminster Mint.
These exquisitely yummy brownie have a hint of mint in their flavor due to the batter being mixed with crushed and dried mint leaves, giving the brownie a light greenish color. This is a refreshing breath of air to anyone ingesting the brownie raising their alertness and hence offering a +2 bonus to any Awareness roll. The refreshing alertness last until the next ingestion of food or drink.

Burgomaster’s Lament.
Of course yummy, but also an energy boosting variant. Each brownie confers the eater with the ability to perform his action one phase earlier than he should be able to. Thus, allowing the character to Shoot on Phase 1 instead of Phase 2, Move during Phase 3 instead of Phase 4, etc. Lasts for one arena.

All Natural, Dude.
This brownie is made with all natural elements and is extremely healthy to those who ingest it. Upon finishing the brownie, the eater will have one hit point healed. Eating more than one brownie will heal multiple wounds.

Lumberjack’s Grunt.
This thick and nutty brownie is a hearty one to finish, requiring a Commitment check just to finish eating. Once finished however, it conveys a +2 to any Brawn check until the next ingestion of food. Anyone under the effects of this brownie can never be encumbered.

Just Chill.
Any creature ingesting this must make a Commitment check with a -2 penalty or automatically consider the person handing the brownie to them to be a dear friend. The effect will last the number of rounds equal to 12 minus the die roll for the Commitment check, or until the person offering the brownie takes an action the affected person would consider inconsiderate (such as being attacked by the brownie offerer). During this time, the person ingesting the brownie is open to suggestion and easily manipulated.

The Rainbow, Man.
The top of this brownie is covered with colorful sprinkles. Upon ingesting this brownie, the eater must make a Charm  check with a -2 penalty. Failure results in the person seeing stars, rainbows, glitter showering from the sky, etc. The effect is so awesome (no pun intended) that the person must make a successful Charm check (no penalty) to take any action besides staring skyward in awe. Lasts for d12 rounds.

Dashingly Daring.
A soft, moist brownie covered with a thin coat of powdered sugar. Anyone ingesting this brownie gains immediate sexual prowess, providing them with a +2 to any Charm or Daring check. The effect lasts for d12 hours.

Nibbles.
A thin brownie with raisins This brownie is  dangerous, anyone ingesting it becomes immediately nervous and agitated. The effect lasts for d12 hours and any action they take suffers a -2 to the roll. Only a Commitment check with the die rolling a natural 12 can combat the effects of this powerful brownie.  They are also struck with the annoyingly insatiable desire to munch on snacks.

Dung Bunny.
This brownie is wonderfully sweet to the taste, but has a terrible effect. Anyone ingesting must make a Commitment check or suffer the ill effects for d12 days. An hour after eating this brownie, the person will begin to reek of fresh, hot dung. The effect is poisonous to any social situation and cannot be covered with perfume or washed off in a bath. Anyone standing within ten feet, or down wind, will be disgusted by the smell and want to move away immediately.

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